WTF

DUDE. have you seen this yet?



Well, in celebration, SF is hosting a Snuggie Pub Crawl. NOTHING makes me happier, and I am totally going.

SORRY SORRY it's been awhile.

I have sooo many updates, but I just want to get this out first!!

THIS IS AN AMBER-ENDORSED EVENT:

http://grilledcheeseinvitational.com/index.html

Unfortunately, I'm working a blogger event at the AMC theatre on Van Ness, but I wish I were doing this instead.

someone, please go, and let me know how it freaking is!!

Over It, Amber Is.

I began this blog thinking I would chronicle my goings ons and happenings, because I live in an awesome city and I do awesome things, because I am by default awesome. However, since this blog is also about me, I'm going to vent about dating in SF.

I am a recovering serial monogamist. In high school, I stayed with the first guy I slept with for two and a half years. Then when I went to college, I met someone else and the combination of that, plus the fact that the high school boyfriend was just failing in life, made me seamlessly move on to my college boyfriend. We broke up during freshman year, but we continued to live and work together the following summer. I was really devastated, but then I met my next boyfriend in class and we dated for another two and half years, then were off and on for two and half years after that. During the second two and half years, I also dated another guy with whom I was madly in love, and one I met in Israel that I was involved with for years as well.

Dating multiple people for extended periods of time was maybe a defense mechanism for getting hurt? Maybe a matter of circumstance since we didn't live in the same place after awhile? Either way, it was a foreshadowing of what was to come in SF.

I have only had one official boyfriend since living here. And that only technically lasted about 6 months. AND? I've lived here for four years. And? I hate being single. HATE.

I date a lot people. I date a lot of people at once. I only do that because if I don't, I get attached and that's problematic since it never goes anywhere. However, often, inevitably, I get attached anyway. Sometimes I'll play the coy 'I don't care' card, but sometimes I just get frustrated and will ask what's going on. Either way, the answer always seems to be the same- not interested, don't want a girlfriend.

Only, all of my 'ex's' - if you can call them that, currently have girlfriends. And I can't help but feel like an ugly, fat, stupid, messy, undesirable girl, if I was the last person they were all with and now they all have girlfriends.

I've failed to mention something else- and that's that my ex's from Santa Cruz and that time in my life are all still very close to me. Some of them still tell me how incredible I am and how much they want to be with me. And that's a far cry from how dismissive everyone is in transient SF. I'm so spoiled and I didn't even realize it.

I just feel... empty.

On Why I Love My Roomate

12:22 PM Dana: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5VXY5OVBXpM

this is benjys friend

me: dude. he's so fresh.

12:23 PM -sidenote, CAN one use the words 'dude' and 'fresh' in a sentence? isn't that like, a mullato sentence or something?

Dana: no it actually works perfectly

12:24 PM me: because they're both so circa 1992?

:)

Dana: yes

me: lol

Industrious Revolution

I need one. Because today? I cannot concentrate for the life of me.

It's just that doing monotonous busy work has never been my forte. I am a big-picture person, and can't be bothered with annoying details. OH DETAILS. lament lament.

Anyway, today I successful committed time evasion for five hours. And? I blame my good friend alcohol.

Last night I went to Shine to see Hookers & Blow, which was awesome (par usual). Paul, Ben, Aaron, and their friends and I all met on a sinister-looking corner between all of our houses and collectively booked it to the bar. The audience just looked... cool. There is a very specific type of burner that is drawn to this glitchy, psyphy music that these guys play- and their aesthetic is hard to pin point. Since I must use my words, however, I would describe it as post-apocalyptic army wear mixed with Victorian accents. Meaning, lots of army green, brown and black, tweed vests, pinstriped stockings, fedoras with feathers, elaborate swept updos made of braids and dreds and nests of curls, tribal earrings and leather bracelets, body-hugging pants and swirling skirts. I know it sounds odd, but when you look around the room you think, wow! this rug really ties it together.

I love people watching.

Weeked Forecast

Thursday Night - Hookerz & Blow & Anasia at Shine!
Saturday - Berkeley Kite Festival
Sunday - Indie Mart Street Festival

Woohoo!

Staying In.

I rarely listen to my body, and I am often a victim of peer pressure. Perhaps, even at 26, it's leftover from having insanely overprotective parents, or maybe I just like feeling good about being bad.

"Hey Amber, take this Jager-bomb."
"Um, gross. No."
"Do it!"
"OK."

"Come on. Eat this."
"No! I'm full."
"So am I."
"OK."

"Dude. That looks hot on you. Buy it!"
"No, I have to budget."
"Yeah but when will you find something else that looks just as good?"
"OK."

"Do this."
"No, I'm trying to quit."
"I paid for it. Do it."
"OK."

...These types of conversations happen to me on a daily basis.

However, for the last two days in a row, I haven't had a drop to drink. I can't even remember the last time this has happened. It's not that I'm drunk every night, but I definitely drink at least a glass of wine every day.

I think it was easier because I came straight home and cooked dinner for Dave and myself. And, I surprised myself in the kitchen. I'm not one for cooking usually, but threw together some spicy black beans, fried bananas, and a mango/avo/radish/cucumber/cilantro salad with tamarind soy dressing, and if I do say so myself, it was AWESOME.

Um, did I mention Dave stayed over?

yay me!