PAINT IT RED!

welcome to my world... hybrid art house/burner/scenester parties, art gallery openings, wine-induced philosophical arguments, concerts, sporadic street festivals, etc. I'll be your virtual tour guide to my experiences here in San Francisco.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Over It, Amber Is.

I began this blog thinking I would chronicle my goings ons and happenings, because I live in an awesome city and I do awesome things, because I am by default awesome. However, since this blog is also about me, I'm going to vent about dating in SF.

I am a recovering serial monogamist. In high school, I stayed with the first guy I slept with for two and a half years. Then when I went to college, I met someone else and the combination of that, plus the fact that the high school boyfriend was just failing in life, made me seamlessly move on to my college boyfriend. We broke up during freshman year, but we continued to live and work together the following summer. I was really devastated, but then I met my next boyfriend in class and we dated for another two and half years, then were off and on for two and half years after that. During the second two and half years, I also dated another guy with whom I was madly in love, and one I met in Israel that I was involved with for years as well.

Dating multiple people for extended periods of time was maybe a defense mechanism for getting hurt? Maybe a matter of circumstance since we didn't live in the same place after awhile? Either way, it was a foreshadowing of what was to come in SF.

I have only had one official boyfriend since living here. And that only technically lasted about 6 months. AND? I've lived here for four years. And? I hate being single. HATE.

I date a lot people. I date a lot of people at once. I only do that because if I don't, I get attached and that's problematic since it never goes anywhere. However, often, inevitably, I get attached anyway. Sometimes I'll play the coy 'I don't care' card, but sometimes I just get frustrated and will ask what's going on. Either way, the answer always seems to be the same- not interested, don't want a girlfriend.

Only, all of my 'ex's' - if you can call them that, currently have girlfriends. And I can't help but feel like an ugly, fat, stupid, messy, undesirable girl, if I was the last person they were all with and now they all have girlfriends.

I've failed to mention something else- and that's that my ex's from Santa Cruz and that time in my life are all still very close to me. Some of them still tell me how incredible I am and how much they want to be with me. And that's a far cry from how dismissive everyone is in transient SF. I'm so spoiled and I didn't even realize it.

I just feel... empty.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

On Why I Love My Roomate

this is benjys friend
me: dude. he's so fresh.
12:23 PM -sidenote, CAN one use the words 'dude' and 'fresh' in a sentence? isn't that like, a mullato sentence or something?
Dana: no it actually works perfectly
12:24 PM me: because they're both so circa 1992?
:)
Dana: yes
me: lol

Friday, July 25, 2008

Industrious Revolution

I need one. Because today? I cannot concentrate for the life of me.

It's just that doing monotonous busy work has never been my forte. I am a big-picture person, and can't be bothered with annoying details. OH DETAILS. lament lament.

Anyway, today I successful committed time evasion for five hours. And? I blame my good friend alcohol.

Last night I went to Shine to see Hookers & Blow, which was awesome (par usual). Paul, Ben, Aaron, and their friends and I all met on a sinister-looking corner between all of our houses and collectively booked it to the bar. The audience just looked... cool. There is a very specific type of burner that is drawn to this glitchy, psyphy music that these guys play- and their aesthetic is hard to pin point. Since I must use my words, however, I would describe it as post-apocalyptic army wear mixed with Victorian accents. Meaning, lots of army green, brown and black, tweed vests, pinstriped stockings, fedoras with feathers, elaborate swept updos made of braids and dreds and nests of curls, tribal earrings and leather bracelets, body-hugging pants and swirling skirts. I know it sounds odd, but when you look around the room you think, wow! this rug really ties it together.

I love people watching.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Staying In.

I rarely listen to my body, and I am often a victim of peer pressure. Perhaps, even at 26, it's leftover from having insanely overprotective parents, or maybe I just like feeling good about being bad.

"Hey Amber, take this Jager-bomb."
"Um, gross. No."
"Do it!"
"OK."

"Come on. Eat this."
"No! I'm full."
"So am I."
"OK."

"Dude. That looks hot on you. Buy it!"
"No, I have to budget."
"Yeah but when will you find something else that looks just as good?"
"OK."

"Do this."
"No, I'm trying to quit."
"I paid for it. Do it."
"OK."

...These types of conversations happen to me on a daily basis.

However, for the last two days in a row, I haven't had a drop to drink. I can't even remember the last time this has happened. It's not that I'm drunk every night, but I definitely drink at least a glass of wine every day.

I think it was easier because I came straight home and cooked dinner for Dave and myself. And, I surprised myself in the kitchen. I'm not one for cooking usually, but threw together some spicy black beans, fried bananas, and a mango/avo/radish/cucumber/cilantro salad with tamarind soy dressing, and if I do say so myself, it was AWESOME.

Um, did I mention Dave stayed over?

yay me!

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

Curiosity AND Amber Killed The Cat.

I love my roommate's cat.

EXCEPT WHEN HE DOESN'T STOP YELLING AT ME.

Seriously, if he could just type it really would be in ALLCAPS. He's so adorable and really? He just wants me to hold him. All the time. But you see, I can't hold him all the time. There are some special times, like when I'm showering or eating or sleeping or working when I can't hold him. And I guess he doesn't understand that, because he's a cat.

I'm his sole provider until Blu gets back from NY, and for the most part I love it, but it's definitely getting old. And? It made me think seriously about having kids. Because if I can't take a cat yelling at me all day long, how am I going to take care of an infant?

That is all.

Monday, July 21, 2008

Weekend Warrior

FRIDAY

I ended up having to work at night for this thing for TNT for Christine, but it turned out to be AWESOME. After a few debacles in terms of transportation, I picked up the very talented Roger and Talicia, both writers for Saving Grace. I brought them to what was coincidentally the after party for the BlogHer Conference where I got to see my darling Jenny! Who happened to be at the Conference too.

Jenny and I have been friends since 6th grade, and I adore her. I finally got to meet her BFF Julia too, which was awesome.

So, after the after party, I took the girls to my house, then to meet up with Dave and Paul and Dave's old roomate, T. Then we went to Kelly's to celebrate the DEATH OF HER ANGRY, OLD NEIGHBOR. I don't know about you, but to me? That feels... wrong. And kind of funny. OK, really funny. Then Julia and Jenny went home, and then I went home with Dave. Which was... awesome. But not before informing him that my parents would be at the movie premier that my dad is in.

SATURDAY

omfg. I woke up in Dave's bed.

Dave, Paul, T, and I all went to lunch together. Then I left to feed Nicole's cats and then to Ikea.

IKEA IS HELL. Everything looks so nice and put together upstairs. But then you go downstairs to try and get all the pieces to make your furniture and then you cry. A lot. Because seriously? I'm 5'4". How am I supposed to lift something that's twice my size?

Anyway. I got home, and then met up with the boys again. And I stayed at Daves. AGAIN.

SUNDAY

Worked at the bar. meh.

T was incredibly drunk, and spewing compliments to me, which was really endearing. I know he spoke to Dave about "us" and I'm not sure what Dave thought, but... he invited me over. AGAIN. Only he didn't pick up his phone by the time I was off work cause he passed out.

But I mean... really????

I hope this works out.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Oh, Comedy! I love you so.

Last night I went to the Orpheum Theater with some coworkers to see...

EDDIE EFFING IZZARD!

That's right, who wants to fucking touch me?

Eddie Izzard is one of my favorite comedians of all time, ever. This tour was a comprehensive view of world history. Absolutely fantastic, I highly recommend checking him out if you get the chance.

Here's a photo to show you what it looked like from the nose bleed seats :)















After I got back, I was pleasantly surprised by an imprompu candle-lit slam poetry reading of sorts at the 16th Street BART station. I love the spontenaity of events in SF.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Wednesday is the New Friday.

Last night I got out of work at 10. I returned to a series of missed calls and texts because I left my phone at home. I mean, really people? You want me to come out on a Wednesday? Why not I guess. I did, after all, go for it on Monday.

So I get a text from sleepyhead saying he's spinning after the flying skulls. Only it's not in the neighborhood, it's at Madrone. Oh, and he's not going on til 12. Every inch of my body said "fuck off with your bad self." However, he managed to convince me to go out anyway.

Madrone is an awesome bar- with a descent sound system, lots of interesting, funky art, and a small arsenal of fresh, home made infused vodkas (I do not partake in vodka, however. Pabst all the way!!) I started shaking it as soon as possible. I coined a new phrase: the crunky chicken. One of the boys was going off on the floor. Feel free to spread the word. My buddy Majitope was there, just hanging out, among others.

The Flying Skulls is composed of three DJs- including my buddy Jeff. They have a dope sound- it's glitchy, basey hip hop. Then Sleepyhead came on- he's only 22 and produces all his own stuff. It's beautiful, intricate, surprising crunk-step/IDM. Low Pro Lounge (Jeff's actually a memember of this arts collective) is putting out Sleepyhead's LP on their label. Exciting stuff.

After three PBRs it definitely sounded like a good idea to go to Jeff and his wife Corey's place for the after party, since it was just across the street. I attempted to faintly decline. "nooo nooo, I have work..." but of course it was futile. Once we got back, I was treated to the most hilarious, innovative beatboxing session of my life- and then more booze, and then Rock Band. Hilarity ensued.

Once, while we were on the roof looking over the very sinister, dark street, the neighbor leaned out the window and yelled, "can you please go inside? Sorry, I work in social services. The hours are not flexible." It remains unknown exactly why she said she works in social services, because at the time you could definitely hear screams of "KICK HIM IN THE NUTS! TEAR HIS MUTHAFUGGIN HEAD OFF!" since the boys had switched gears from Rock Band to Boxing on the Wii.

And then? Then it was 3:30. And I finally went home.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Africa in SF

Last night I went to dinner with Blu, her brother (who is COMPLETELY different than Blu, I might add) and our friends.

Little Baobab
is a total gem. It's a Senegalese night club with food, and it's amazing. I love love love the funky, painted walls, the hip hop and world music, and delicious drinks. Then we went to the Skylark for their Dancehall/Reggae night, which was HILARIOUS and completely different than the rest of their nights there. The nag champa /weed smoke MAY have had a familiar stench... what was it again? oooooh! SANTA CRUZ.

That's right. For one night only, I foraged the time and space continuum and made it back home to hippieville. It was hilarious, and allowed me to play one of my favorite games - the "watch the hippie interpretive dance" game. There were people rolling on the floor, doing the bird dance, the I'm going with the flow of the ocean dance, and the "I'm making a basket" dance. These dances aren't quite as exotic as the dirty raver variety, such as the crunkstep chicken or striphop, but they're awesome to watch anyway.

And as a nightcap, Blu tried on THE OUTFIT: gold dollar bill necklace, gold hoop earrings with her name on them, GOLD HIGHTOPS, and a black tube top and black pants. so awesome.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

American Girl

Today I'm going to see the A's and the Cubs with my Allied girls. I can't wait to drink beer in the stadium! it's going to be so hot. There's nothing more 'Merican' than beer and baseball in July.

Happy almost birthday, America.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Absinthe Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

I love my job. Absolutely Love it.

I stumbled into PR and marketing serendipitously, although in hindsight, I certainly feel as though I was on the path in this direction from the get-go. I've just always loved communication and people and networking. It just makes sense.

The basic gist of my job is that I make a big deal out of movies before they come out so that people recognize the title and want to contribute to opening box office sales. That includes a lot of different things, like reaching out to various groups, inviting them to screenings that I set up, and sometimes having press tours. Occasionally, we'll have a movie premier, like yesterday.

Yesterday we did a premier for a short called The Butler's In Love. As far as I understand, it was the marketing ploy of an importing company in the East Bay that happens to bring in Absinthe. Absinthe has a long historical courtship with art. The wormwood in it makes people hallucinate- allegedly that's why Van Gogh cut off his ear. So, to sponsor a film makes complete sense.

This film was backed by David Arquette and Courtney Cox's film company, and it was shot in SF- so naturally we had Mr. and Mrs. Arquette at the premier, along with our mayor Gavin Newsome.

Now, I'm from Santa Cruz (definitely not anything close to Hollywood,) and I still get awe-struck by celebrities. I'm even shocked every time I get to meet a famous DJ from the parties my arts collective throws in the city- so to meet a celebrity is just... crazy.

In any case, I had this awesome sense of pride after the night was over. Something like, wow! I can't believe I'm doing what I should be doing. Finally!

Here are some photos!




































































































26! ohmygodwhatthehellamidoingwithmylife

My birthday was more like a birthweek this year.

It started with TRBL, my monthly party at Anu on Friday the 13th. This month we had Mr. Projectile play for us, which was awesome.























Next, I worked at the bar on Sunday the 15th and closed early, then hung out with my friend Nina and my coworker Anye. Good times!

Wednesday night I had an impromptu party at my new house with Blu and several of our mutual friends, including Em, Jayme, Dave, Paul, Serge, Mycho, and Kiersten. We all went to Mighty where Skream & Benga, the two biggest DJs in dubstep were playing. Nicole joined us there and we all did our little dubstep dances happily.

Thursday night I partied with my wonderful work friends at Zebulon, then went on to a terrible dinner with Oskar. When I say terrible, I mean horrible. He casually mentioned he had just procured a girlfriend, and I completely lost my appetite. He's always been really amazing with timing.

Friday I finally left work to go to beautiful Santa Cruz for RAINDANCE! Here are some hilarious photos from my weekend camping trip can be found here:











































































FAIL

OK OK

So, I've actually attempted to start blogs twice: once in 2006 and once practically a year ago. I know, it's pathetic. But, the social network is a dying animal (for the moment at least), and I love reading my friends' blogs so much that I decided heck- I'll go ahead and do it too. For real this time.

A lot has happened in the last four years. I say four because it's 2008 and a half, and 2004 is when I graduated and joined the "real world" and moved to SF, so that seems like a good enough place from which to start this blog.

To summarize:
After I graduated from UCSC with a degree in Political Theory and a minor in Legal Studies, plus an emphasis in Media Criticism, I went on the Birthright Israel trip. Then I came home and worked four jobs, then went back to Israel a second time through the Union of Progressive Zionists. I returned completely excited to join the real world, but alas, there are no jobs in Santa Cruz. Then I became depressed, and jump-started my life again by moving to beautiful San Francisco.

I switched jobs and houses a lot. It's too complicated to write out in sentence form, so just for future reference, see below:

Jobs
Dialogue Direct - Team Leader, Office Manager
UCSF Department of Urology - Data Entry Chode
Barfly Promotions - Promo Girl
PENSCO Trust Company - Marketing Assistant
Place Pigalle/Medici - Bartender
Allied Advertising and PR - Publicist

Projects
The Fringe Arts Collective - Art Director/Online Promotions
The Disposable Film Festival - Director of PR
Union of Progressive Zionists - Regional Coordinator of CA

Houses
Bernal Heights
-Jake, Jared, Jason, Chris, Michael, me and Kirsten
Lower Haight/Hayes Valley
-Nina, Kirsten
Inner Richmond
-Jordan, Ashley, Louise, and some other hippie girls
Inner Sunset
-Kevin
back to Inner Richmond
Bernal Heights
-Seth and Juls
FINALLY to:
Deboce Triangle/Mission
Blu

DATING
I've dated a lot of people in SF and nothing ever really works out, but here is a list of the ones who are fairly important:
Antonio
Kevin
John (hot guy)
Jamie (airplane boy)
Dave
Oskar (salad boy)
Carlton

OK, that's a lot of info.

Basically, as of right now, here's what's happening with me. I just turned 26, I love my job as a publicist for film. I'm preparing to move again this weekend, but I love my new roomate and I love the location. For the first time on both fronts I feel satisfied. I feel as though I could really see them both through for awhile, and that feels really, really good.

The only thing missing is a love of my life, and I can't wait for it to happen. I'm so tired of waiting.